Thursday, January 04, 2007

A sad day for lesbians

I'm heading out shortly for happy hour and I'll be pouring out a little beer for my homies -- the Charlotte Sting.

In today's business section, we reported that the professional team will be disbanding and the players will be shipped to other franchises. It's a loss for the city, but it's an even bigger loss for lesbians in the Carolinas.

I know -- the WNBA doesn't like to talk about the lesbian factor. But it's no secret that WNBA games are gathering places for lesbians. Yes, the games show us the best in basketball, where we actually see teamwork and it's not all about the personalities and high-flying dunks.

But for me the games were more than that. In a city like Charlotte, where lesbians -- especially middle-class black ones -- tend to be closeted or cocooners, Sting games were places to get my flirt on and simply socialize with like-minded women.

The games drew a mix of women: some were single lesbians, others were couples, and some had children. It was a mix of lipstick and baby butches.

I'm one of the slackers who never made it to a game at Bobcats Arena, but I fondly remember the days at the Charlotte Coliseum. Halftime was the best. We'd walk around the concourse and I would typically run into someone from Columbia, S.C., or Raleigh. We'd hug, catch up and promise to stay in touch. At the next game, we'd do it all over again.

Almost as big as the games were the after-parties, which drew a mix women. Today, I have a close network of friends, but I feel for the young women and newcomers who are dying for a place to meet other women. They lost one of the best lesbian assets.

38 comments:

Alan R. Weetabish Jr. said...

Thats too bad. Maybe now you can (please)move to another city that still has a lesbian basketball team.

Watching all those sweaty butches play roundball was almost as entertaining as playing checkers with a statue.

No one (except a handful of lesbians) will miss the Sting. Most people won't even realize the team is no longer here, that is if they knew we even had one in the first place.

Plus,I'm sure if Bob Johnson was white, you'd be up in arms, all over him about letting the team collapse, and for letting down all you lesbian sistas down as well.

The fact that no other city was interested in the Sting and the team had to "disband" (something that doesn't happen in real professional sports) tells you all you need to know about the WNBA.

As for the sad and dejected Sting-less "Lesbians Of The Carolinas", don't ya'll worry. The Indigo Girls are still actively touring and The LPGA's Women's Open is in NC this year....So cheer up homegurl! Michelle Wie in da HIZZ-OUSE!!!!!!!!

HoLLa!

Anonymous said...

It's amazing that anyone, much less a large corporation, would actually pay someone to write this bs.

Don't Holla anymore, PLEASE!

Anonymous said...

Wow. I really think that that is the only reaction that I can have. Just wow. I can't believe that this gets posted on the Observer website. Hard to believe that they actually sponsor this.

Seth Chapman said...

Thanks for a great post. It is so easy to overlook the positive social aspect this team has had on our diverse community. With our corporate driven dollars used for maximum profit or even the politics of the arena being built I easily forget that the diverse social interactions in our community actually has value that is lost when such an act as the WNBA leaving the city. How great would it be for a lesbian to make a proposal to buy the team and offer shares to a large pool of women so the team is owned by the women in Charlotte and not just one individual or Corporation. Thanks again for reminding me that I don't live in "my" world, but that I live in "our" world.

JohnPaulVol said...

I'm 35, white, male and straight and am here to tell you that the previous comments on Tonya's article are exactly why Charlotte is 15-20 years behind other world-class U.S. cities. Be educated. Grow up. Stop playing video games and read a book. Jesus...

Anonymous said...

Why be exclusionary and just say that the Sting folding is it such a loss for the lesbians of the area?

Shouldn't it be a loss for basketball fans in general, regardless of their sexual orientation?

You only have yourself to blame for not making it to a game at the new arena? It's clear that many people followed your lead or else the team would have stayed.

Anonymous said...

Charlotte is so homophobic. It's quite sad...

Anonymous said...

Charlotte is so homophobic. It's quite sad...

Anonymous said...

Tonya you are wonderful!

Thank you for your perspective. I never attended a Sting Game but you have confirmed what I suspected all along.

"Games drew .... a mix of lipstick and baby butches."

So considering the demographics of the Sting Fans it should be no surprise that the Sting folded.

Hardly a family venue.

So it's indeed a sad day for lesbians but also a sad day for Charlotte and the investors of the Sting.

Charlotte also lost another family venue this week "First Night" simply died a quiet death.

Why?

Because one group claimed it as thier own in this case street thugs.

Anonymous said...

Isn't there a less complicated way for lesbians to meet? And what does basketball have to do with it?

Anyway, I'm shocked to hear that anyone was interested in the WNBA. It's so far below the radar that not even sports radio never gives it a mention. (Except to say that it failed.)

Anonymous said...

if tom sorenson wrote this he'd have been canned...

Anonymous said...

Anonymous at 11:40pm you will probably appreciate this story...

A few weeks ago I had friends staying with me for the holidays. One of them logged on to Charlotte.com to read our local news, and came upon Tonya's article on Club Onyx and various strip clubs. After reading it she told me that her local paper would never publish something like that, and certainly never the week before Christmas. They have too much class for that. Wish I could say the same. Thanks for the embarrassment Observer. What's planned for Easter - a rundown of the best internet porn sites?

Then Tonya writes this WNBA/lesbian trash, complete with references to baby butches. And if the Sting were such an integral part of the lesbian world, then why is it that you Tonya the queen of Charlotte black lesbians did not make it to even ONE game at Bobcats Arena to support them? Your article is about how this team was so important to the lesbians, yet your actions show otherwise. As usual you are a hypocrite and a racist.

Here's another Tonya gem:

"Almost as big as the games were the after-parties, which drew a mix women."

This amateur doesn't even know how to write. She obviously is a hack who hits the spellcheck button and thinks that qualifies as proofreading her work. Or maybe she's still loaded from all the drinking she does on the company dime.

Either way it's completely unprofessional. Now please excuse me while I go change my homepage from Charlotte.com to News14Carolina.

Anonymous said...

DikeOnABike...you actually get paid to write for the Observer? You have no business writing for a city newspaper. Your articles are uninciteful and appeal to maybe 1% of the observers readers. Your trash would be much better suited for one of the alternative newspapers.

Christian and Katy Myers said...

Although not a basketball fan in general, preferring hockey and baseball, I have attended a couple of Sting games and regardless of what some commenters have said, I think I will miss the Sting. I think that the disbanding is a loss for our city and for the sport. I had not considered the social infrasturcture issues that loss will also mean, so thanks for your insight into that aspect. It is a sad event, and it is too bad that this city, despite it's lip service, can't support our WNBA team, our NBA team, and turn against our NFL team when the going gets a tad rough. Charlotte is certainly not the city I grew up in - and the changes haven't been for the good.

Thanks for your thoughts, it's always interesting to read points of view and perspectives.

Anonymous said...

Why do people have to be so insensitive? It is very important that lesbians have somewhere to gather and rub up against each other. Nothing says hotness like some sweaty Sting players running up and down the court.

The greatest line of this whole "article" was the "baby butches". What the heck does that mean?

The Charlotte Observer should be ashamed to allow this on their webpage. Absolutely ridiculous. The lady said she went their to "get (her) flirt on". Well get that off the pages of this website.

Anonymous said...

This is a BLOG and the author isn't expressing the Observer's opinion, just her OWN. Quit being so narrow minded and remember that this is America and we all have the freedom to express our own opinions and live our own lifestyles. GET OVER IT if this article offends you.

Anonymous said...

What's wrong with this? Did I miss the problem? Or do I sense a darkly held secret about your own sexuality?

Anonymous said...

It's a shame that a beautiful city like Charlotte is harboring so many close-minded, hateful individuals.

Anonymous said...

Why does everything Tonya writes about have to do with gay/lesbian/transgender/whatevertheheckyouare issues? Even if it doesn't, she finds a way to inject the story with something "gay." I don't go around saying, "Darn, that bar closed. It was so much fun meeting my straight friends there!" Good Lord. Gay people are equal to straight people; if only they would start acting like it.......

o. wilde said...

i feel for you. i really do. even the few comments received on this blog indicate why it is so tough for gays and lesbians to meet and socialize openly here. fear exists in the gay community in charlotte and for good reason. most of the people i've run into are intolerant of any person who is different. it's a shame people feel the need to be so ugly and personal in their comments (perhaps they are taking a page out of donald trumps playbook). it reveals their lack of intellect. the natives here always react in the same way...if you don't like it, move. well, little by little they are going to find that we are NOT moving. we will make a place for ourselves here. whether they like it or not.

Anonymous said...

Wow, seriously, I can't believe what I just read.......I have wondered for sometime why they even had the sting (obviously it wasn't their basketball skill - I have played with several at the Y) little did I know it was speed dating for lesbians. These other posters are right...your column is terrible.

Anonymous said...

A sad day, indeed, for lesbians, but a tremendous victory for capitalism.

Anonymous said...

This blog is simply sick!!! The Sting being gone is Charlotte's way of telling the lesbos to be gone. Are they paying you to write this?

Anonymous said...

Hi T.....This region of the US is far to caught up in who you are sleeping with, and what's your job title than any other region in the US. I'm a happy lesbian, who didn't attend the basketball games, yet, I FEEL YOU TANYA! It's bad enough that as middle class, SUCCESSFUL, women, we have only one or two places to intermingle. I relocated from San Diego three years ago, and this place sucks for all women. Gay men are far more present visually in Charlotte, than women. If you're 27-40, and a single Lesbian woman, tough luck here!

Perhaps if everyone just step down off there Billy Graham pedestal, they'll be far less Mark Foleys in the world!!

Pamela

Anonymous said...

Tonya, you do a great job with the Paid to Party column, as far as letting us know what's going on in the city (very necessary since you still have folks complaining there's "nothing to do" in Charlotte). And we know you're gay, too, but that doesn't matter as long as you keep us informed on the party scene. Please stick to that and keep your lesbian issues out of it!

Anonymous said...

With a ringing endorsement like this, I can't imagine why this folded. Sounds like a place I would want to take my daughter...please note the heavy sarcasm!

Anonymous said...

Who in the readership area of this fine publication didn't see this one coming? Hmmmmm?

Anonymous said...

I second that WOW!

Is she seriously implying that everyone on the team or that attended the games was/is a Lesbian?

Tonya, you are a very lonely, confused, pressed to be noticed type of person. Somethings you should discuss amongst your Lesbian friends. Not in a public newspaper article.

GEEZ, GET A LIFE!!!

Anonymous said...

I cannot believe the Charlotte Observer allowed this garbage to be posted on the website. I'm speechless.

Anonymous said...

WNBA= Will Never Be Anything.

Sadly, the WBNA has never really been good except for a the Shock or Liberty. Almost all WNBA teams loss money. I am almost convinced within 5 years, the WNBA will disban.

Anonymous said...

I love it !

Leave it to a bunch of outsiders to stir up a HORNETS NEST!

Hey Y'all need a map?

Anonymous said...

To the poster at 10:18am who says:

"Quit being so narrow minded and remember that this is America and we all have the freedom to express our own opinions and live our own lifestyles. GET OVER IT if this article offends you."

Great point....and right back at you.

So if someone decides to call Tonya the "N-word"; and she gets offended - they should just say GET OVER IT. After all, they are just expressing their opinion right?

You liberals love to call others narrow-minded. But you are such hypocrites because when someone offends YOU with a conservative stance you make it a political issue or a lawsuit. When your viewpoints are offensive to others then you simply say GET OVER IT. That's about a 4th grade level of intelligence.

Anonymous said...

I don't dislike Tonya's columns because she is a lesbian or black, I dislike her columns because they are horrible. I don't give a rip who she wants to sleep with or what color her skin is, but if I'm reading a news site, I want to read well-written, insightful columns - not this drivel.

Anonymous said...

JeanPaul VOL

CHARLOTTE IS NOT AND WILL NEVER BE A
W O R L D
C L A S S
C I T Y .

Anonymous said...

Why is it that every week people complain about Tonya's blog, but they keep coming back. I know it's the same people because they claim that all her blogs are horrible. I need to know why do you continue to read them if you dislike them sooo much.

Anonymous said...

Casual references to heterosexuality don't seem to arouse so much anger. Why is that? Hmm...

At least Tonya's columns, whatever you think of their content, aren't bland, typical or condescending. She takes chances in what she writes and that should be applauded -- even if she (horror of horrors!!!) does mention gays and lesbians.

I wish people would quit getting so offended by any reference to gays or lesbians. It's so tiresome, even to a happily straight woman such as myself.

Anonymous said...

Baby butches? I can't help but wonder if that means young, mid-teen girls who could possibly be 'persuaded' to try some lesbian activity and be converted to that lifestyle choice - and IT IS a choice. Sad.

Anonymous said...

Charlotte's only lesbian event? check out these mamma's... http://www.charlottemayhem.com