Partying at the Bartender's Ball

A woman and man wearing camouflage, a bar made of ice, a giant barrel that dispensed liquor and a man eating an English muffin while he was asleep, were only a few of the experiences at Sunday’s Bartender’s Ball.

The sixth annual event moved back uptown on Sunday, and partiers relished the move. (It was at Merchandise Mart last year.) In the span of five hours, we danced to “Throw Some D’s,” “Sweet Escape,” hard rock and electronica. We hustled in the breakfast buffet line for the Men’s Club only to realize they had run out of syrup for the French toast and their tasty Applewood bacon before 11 p.m. Some of my best memories occurred in the Men’s Club’s area.

I’m sitting at a table eating my French toast watching a drunk guy across the table from me nibble on an English muffin, fall asleep, then nibble some more. Then, he reaches across the table for my English muffin. I stop him, and hand over the bread. He was too drunk for me to get mad – besides, watching him eat and sleep was comical.

If you didn’t go, here are some scenes from the night.

Highlights: Meeting a 53-year-old woman who kept dropping it like it’s hot on my friend J-Dawg…. The hip-hop set before the DJ blew a fuse and the music stopped... Seeing Tempo nightclub participate. It’s the first year I can remember a black-owned establishment participating in the ball. Their theme was Bob Marley’s birthday…. Collecting more beads than my girl… BAR Charlotte’s Valentine’s Day theme. Seeing cupid run around in his underwear was too funny…. Buffalo Wild Wing’s honey barbecue wings. Yes, the Men’s Club’s roast beef and spinach dip were tasty, but Buffalo Wild Wing’s line was shorter, and sometimes you want greasy chicken wings to go with a night of drinking.


Lowlights: The women’s bathroom was a haven for lung cancer. Smoking wasn’t allowed in the main ballrooms, so many women lit up in the bathroom. It was horrible…Some folks were stupid drunk by the end of the night.

Top three bars were: Cans (Armed Services Day), Brick and Barrel (End of Prohibition) and the Irish bars (St. Patrick’s Day).

What you missed: The La Poire Grey Goose (pear-flavored) mixed with pomegranate juice at Loft’s booth…A peek at the Greek crew’s newest venture, Alley Cat… Spykes, a flavored caffeine, ginseng and guarana mix that you pour in beer.

Did you go the Bartender’s Ball? How did you like it? How did it compare to last year’s?

Shakespeare in yo' face

A large ramp extended down from the second tier to the promenade floor of the Duke Family Performance Hall inside Davidson’s Knobloch Campus Center. We sat on the side of the ramp Saturday, waiting for the start of Shakespeare’s “Pericles.”

I hadn’t planned to attend the Royal Shakespeare Company’s production, but co-worker Kathy Haight raved so much about seeing one of the productions last week that I wanted to see one for myself.

On Saturday, I understood why Kathy liked it so much. For slightly more than three hours, I felt as if I were in the play. Standing on the promenade, I never knew when a gun-toting thug, drag queen or king would come storming past me. My only complaint was the length. I don’t like sitting through two-hour movies, so a three-hour play is way too long.

“Pericles” isn’t “to be or not to be”-style Shakespeare. Although I did get lost sometimes when the griot was narrating the story, for the most part, “Pericles” was accessible to low-brow theater fans like me. It tells the story of a Pericles, the king of Tyre, who fled his country, found love and lost it, and thought his daughter was dead.

Instead of everything happening on one stage, the play unfolds throughout the promenade. Audience members standing in the promenade scooted around to see the action and to avoid getting in the actor’s way. There was fencing, a man being thrown ashore, a brothel and an angel descending from the sky. Actors pointed guns at us and at times spoke directly to us.

It was theater in a way that I've never experienced before, and can't wait to experience again. (If the play is shorter.)

Mardi Gras in Lake Norman

Purple, gold and green balloons formed an arch above the bar inside NV nightclub. The head of a giant jester hung from the

ceiling. A man wearing purple royal robes and purple face paint handed out beads.

On Saturday, NV made partiers feel as if they were on Bourbon Street. Beads dropped from the club’s balcony, music boomed, women and men wore masks, and people danced all over each other to top 40 hip-hop.

To make the experience even more authentic: a girl standing on the dance floor threw up, apologized, and went back to dancing. Surprisingly, the only thing I didn’t see was girls showing their breasts for beads.

My girl and I got into a contest to see who could get the most beads. We each started with three. On the way inside, she found a set on the ground. Once inside, the purple-face man gave me a set. Then a big sweetheart from Asheville gave me a handful. He said he’d recently ended an 11-year relationship with a woman who had a wild hair. He was visiting with his two brothers, and he wanted to give me a handful of beads because he liked us.

I was leading the bead pack, but my girl got inspired. She hustled one guy out of a nice set, and then the big Asheville guy gave her a handful. Before the end of the night, she’d earned 17 and I only had 10 -- but hey, Mardi Gras partying is just getting started.

On Tuesday, there are Fat Tuesday parties at Cans and Dixie’s Tavern. My girl is going down.

Who exactly cares about Anna Nicole?

At midnight on Valentine’s Day, the music stopped inside Club Onyx on Old Pineville Road. Ten dancers walked out onto the stage and gave each other perplexed looks.

The announcer explained: Last week, Anna Nicole Smith passed away, he began.

“And?” someone said.

The announcer continued, explaining that Smith used to dance at Rick’s Cabaret, which owns Club Onyx in Houston. (In fact, that’s where she met her late husband.) So at midnight, all of the Rick’s Cabarets around the country were saluting Smith. At each club, the dancers were expected to come out on stage at midnight and blow her a kiss.

In Charlotte, the dancers bowed their heads for a brief moment of silence. Then the music started, and the dancers marched off-stage indifferent to what had just happened.

Their nonchalance struck me as curious. It seemed like Smith’s rise to fame would appeal to the dancers, but it didn’t. I interviewed a few, who didn’t care much about her.

Nya had the most to say: “She’s a dancer. A lot of people have this misconception about her. Everybody has to eat somehow.”

The evening reminded me of a conversation I had earlier with Kitch. He said black people don’t care about Smith. I thought he was trippin’, and argued that blacks and whites were both interested. I said everyone wants to know what’s going to happen body, who’s the father of her child, and who would raise her kid. Kitch argued that if it was Lil’ Kim, blacks would pay more attention.

After going to Onyx on Wednesday, I wonder if he’s right. Is there a cultural difference in interest about Smith, and if so, why? Post your response below.

The gay agenda in Charlotte

Poetry flowed, bodies danced and women connected at the one-year anniversary party for In the Lyfe, a promotions company for lesbians of color that is building a following with its parties at Wine Up in NoDa.

At Wine Up last Friday, the evening started with a poetry open-mike. (Let me just say that I don’t understand why they continue to have open-mike poetry when the audience refuses to be quiet. They need to either start asking rude patrons to leave, or add a separate open-mike poetry night where talking won’t be tolerated.)

After the poetry, the dance floor opened and filled quickly. Some women danced, a few shot pool and others talked around the bar.

The In the Lyfe parties draw a mix of lesbians of all ages and styles, from baby butches(young lesbians who dress like teenage boys) to stylish ones rocking cool hats (not just me) to older ones content wearing jeans and sweaters. They remind me of when I used to party in my 20s at Club Myxx, Scorpios and a now-closed spot that used to be on Morehead Street near WBT studios.

The parties come at a time when Charlotte is struggling to find leaders in the gay and lesbian community. The Lesbian and Gay Community Center, which hasn’t reached out to homosexuals who aren’t middle-class and white, is in danger of closing. On Tuesday, the Center’s leadership held a town hall meeting to discuss the future of the Center.

On Sunday, Unity Fellowship Church is launching culture week at Spirit Square. It is trying to raise money to support a tutoring and career development program for at-risk high school students at UFC Charlotte's Freedom Center. Sunday’s event will feature “Black and Like Us Too,” a photo exhibit that looks at the lives of gay African-Americans through the lens of photographer Moye.

There will also see a play “WORDS: The Isms,” which tackles issues related to fear of people who are different. It's at 8 p.m. Sunday at Spirit Square, and tickets are $25; 704-567-5007 for details. The photo exhibit will also be at the Afro-American Cultural Center on Wednesday, and will be part of a discussion that evening beginning at 7 p.m. www.ufccharlotte.org.

In March, several black gays and lesbians will meet to develop ways for African American gays to take more active leadership roles in the politics and the happenings of this city. (At least, I hope that’s the overall goal of the meeting.) Assuming the Lesbian and Gay center remains open the meeting will be there.

Others are organizing as well. Next week, according to an e-mail I received Wednesday, several local church leaders will meet at Blumenthal Performing Arts Center from 7-9 p.m. Monday through Friday of next week for a lecture series to discuss the homosexual agenda (you know there is one gay agenda for the entire world).

These organizers have timed their meetings to protest the 12th annual Human Rights Campaign Gala “Equality is Forever,” which will be on Feb. 24 at the Charlotte Convention Center. I can’t imagine who wouldn’t want to protest equal rights for everyone, but I digress.

The annual fundraiser will feature singer Jennifer Holliday, but will also address serious issues facing gays and lesbians throughout the country. In Wednesday's Paid to Party: Hump Day column, I will run the list of HRC dinner pre-parties and after-parties. Until then, get info at www.hrccarolinas.org.

The city’s gays and lesbians face some challenging days ahead, and it’s encouraging to see that many are coming together to tackle the challenges.

What do you think are the biggest challenges facing gays and lesbians in Charlotte? Post your replies below.

Pre-Valentine's parties wrap-up

Men and women in jeans, button-downs and tight-fitting clothes huddled to keep warm as they waited to get inside Cans for the Fourth Annual Anti-Valentine’s Day Bash, the first stop on my round of parties Saturday.

Inside, people shouted over the music. Downstairs, pockets of people danced to a mix of ’80s rock and recent hip-hop hits.

Over in South End, men and women wearing all-black, liquid latex, electrical tape, jeans and T-shirts, dog collars (or barely nothing at all) waited to get inside Amos’ Southend for the Purgatory fetish party.

Inside, two shirtless men danced on stage. Near the rear of the club, a woman - her hands bound to her feet - hung from a swing suspended from the ceiling. A go-go dancer gyrated on a platform in front of the sound booth.

My final stop was at Southend Brewery for Six Figures Entertainment’s Valentine Heartbreak Ball. Six Figures is a new player in the urban party promotion world. Like many others, it promises an upscale atmosphere.

On Saturday, they drew a light, but fun crowd. They closed off the bar area with a white curtain and kept all of the partiers in the main dining area. When you walked inside, there was a VIP setup on the right. It featured a small buffet with pasta, chicken and salad. Each table also had a bottle of Moet. Nice touch.

Most of the men wore suits or nice jeans and button-downs, and the women wore tasteful dresses and slacks as well. Initially, all of the women were on the dance-floor side, while most of the men gathered in the bar area. The women didn’t wait on the men. They paired off and danced, or did the Electric Slide as a group. It felt like a high school prom. (Fellas, you looked real weak.)

Eventually, the promoters dragged a few men onto the dance floor. DJ L. Boogie’s mix of old school R&B - like Frankie Beverly and Maze - created an African American wedding reception/family reunion feel.

If Six Figures can keep the guys on the dance floor and continue to host parties like this, it might become the next big player in the urban party market here.

Updated Valentine's parties for tonight

FUNNY CUPID: Comedians Tommy Davidson & Nessie and R&B singer Calvin Richardson headline Love and Laughter Show. 8 p.m. Big Chill. $15 and up. 704-503-4242.
CUPID ROCKS: Incognito Mosquito, Breaking Laces and others headline the Anti-Valentine's Masquerade. 8 p.m. Neighborhood Theatre. $8-$10. www.neighborhoodtheatre.com.
CUPID PUCKERS UP: Rumba in Kiss Alley. Danny Love’s the DJ. Best kiss contest. 10 p.m. Skandalos. $10. 704-777-6868.
I HEART CUPID: No Question and Just Woo Me present a romantic night with DJ Prince and R&B singer Fareed. 8 p.m. Wednesday. Fox & Hound. $10. 704-965-3434; www.noquestent.com.
ANGRY CUPID: The Takeover Friday guys celebrate lost and nonexistent love at their Bitter Party. 7 p.m. Tutto Mondo. Free. www.takeoverfriday.com for invitation.
HAPPY CUPID: Lovers & Friends party featuring the sounds of DJ Chase. Party presented by Funklabb. 8 p.m. Sunset Club. $10 and up. 704-819-3558, dre@thefunklabb.com
VIOLENT CUPID: Bring an item of your ex’s and throw it in the wood chipper outside of Buckhead for the Shred Your Ex. party. There will be prizes and drink specials. Live from Hot Sauce. .Buckhead Saloon. www.Myspace.com/BuckheadCharlotte

Please note: the NV item was removed. Their party was Saturday. They will be having a huge Mardi Gras party on Saturday.

Stank staff

I don’t know what’s up with Time Lounge, but some of its Tuesday night staff needed an attitude adjustment.

Outside the front door, a security guard dressed in black (including a Neoprene face mask, though it wasn’t that cold) looked as if he was itching for a fight. I tried to make small talk, but he just demanded my I.D. On the other hand, Mr. Tough Guy was totally friendly with the group of giggly girls behind me.

Service at the bar wasn’t much better. Though the club wasn't crowded, it took forever to get a drink; when I finally got one, the bartender acted as if it were a
chore.

I chatted with a couple of guys here from Boston who received the same treatment. They said bartenders in Boston are always rude, so they were used to the behavior.

I don’t always expect a Coke and a smile, but I also don't expect the staff to act stank -- especially when the place isn’t packed.

Have you been to any bars or clubs where the service has been less than pleasant? If so, what's your story? Post your reply below.

Super Bowl in Nashville

I watched the Super Bowl in Nashville, Tenn., at Road Dawg’s uncle’s
house. He’s been throwing a Super Bowl party for 12 years. You know what that means: Road trip!

The party was crazy. I figured since the house was a
mini-mansion, we’d be hanging with a bunch of pretentious buppies. I was wrong. It was as if someone had brought the regulars at Coyote Joe’s here.

After the game ended, the music started. One guy wanted to hear Bobby Womack-style slow songs all night. An older lady boogied to T.I.’s “Top Back.” That was funny. I caused a minor uproar when I told a touchy-feely girl to stop touching my head. She stomped out of the room yelling Jesus Christ. That was funny, too.

After the real bartenders left, I learned how to make a Buttery Nipple (Butterscotch schnapps and Bailey’s). I perfected my pomegranate martini. Oh, and I discovered that apple martini’s should be green,not clear.

It was my kind of party.

CIAA PARTIES 2007

Get ready to party for CIAA with Vivica Fox, Mims, EPMD and more.

Shooting in the clubs

By now, I’m sure you heard about the shooting inside Crush nightclub on Sunday night.

Apparently, two people suffered leg wounds.
When I first heard about it, I wasn’t surprised. Sundays at Crush draw what I call the white-T-shirt-gold-teeth crowd. It tends to be a young and rowdy crowd, sort of like the black equivalent to slam dancers.

I figured someone would eventually get shot at the popular Sunday night gathering.

Since the incident, I’ve learned that my assumption was incorrect. Yes, two people were injured. Yes, someone smuggled a gun into the club. But the shooting wasn’t the result of an altercation. Word on the street is that someone had a gun in his pants and he was jumping around while dancing. The gun went off.

I’m glad the shooting wasn’t intentional, but there are still some serious issues to address here.

First, I’m angry that a partier brought a gun into the club in the first place.

If Charlotte’s little wannabe-thugs would stop associating their manhood with violence, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. But time and time again, too many of the young men who wear oversized T-shirts and prefer rappers whose names start with “Lil’” act as if they go to the club to fight, not party. Guys, grow up.

Second, the club must improve security. They know who they draw on Sundays. I understand how shootings occur in club parking lots, but there’s no excuse for a gun to get inside a club.

I’m glad to know that since Sunday’s incident, the security guard in charge of pat-downs that night will no longer be used at Crush, and the club plans to start using metal detectors on Sundays as well (unfortunately, a measure that's overdue).

(BTW: I realize black clubgoers aren’t the only ones dealing with this. The same night the Crush incident happened, someone was killed at the Hispanic club El Vaquero in East Charlotte.)

What else can clubs do to improve security? What else can we do to get young knuckleheads to stop tripping in clubs?

Bobcats arena blackout over

The hip-hop and R&B blackout at Bobcats Arena is finally over. Jamie Foxx will bring his Unpredictable Tour there on March 23. Tickets go on sale Feb. 9. $59.75. www.charlottebobcatsarena.com; 1-800-495-2295.)

A couple of television news stations and some friends of mine have talked about the lack of hip-hop and R&B acts at the Arena since it opened. Some saw the lack of bookings among those types of artists as racist; I argue that there currently aren’t any good hip-hop and R&B tours to book at the arena.

I have absolutely, positively no desire to see Foxx, but I am glad he’s coming. He’s a good fit for the arena. His fans can afford the ticket price, and he’s popular enough to draw a decent crowd.

Right now, he’s all that hip-hop and R&B fans are going to get over there. Justin Timberlake is currently on tour. (He’s not black, but Michael Jackson isn’t either.) He and Christina Aguilera are the only acts currently touring in the U.S. who would draw hip-hop fans and do well in the Arena.

What do you think? Is the arena doing enough to get hip-hop and R&B acts? Who would you like to see perform there? Post your replies below.

Paella and salsa, life is good

I swung by the French restaurant Patou Bistro in Dilworth for a Latin party. I know that sounds weird, but it was the best stop I made Friday night.

When I walked in the door, men and women dipped and twirled to tango music. A DJ, set up in a corner, spun salsa, tango and Middle Eastern music. That’s what a call a mix. Do you know how refreshing it was to not hear one song that’s playing on the radio?

That wasn’t it, though. Before I could start snapping pictures of dancers who make me look like I have two right feet, I spied a gigantic wok thing.

My stomach pulled me to the left side of the restaurant in front of the bar, where a guy gently stirred the biggest skillet of paella (well, the only skillet of paella) that I’ve ever seen. He pushed around the layers of Spanish rice, peas, prawns and mussels. I wanted to stick my face in the skillet and bob for prawns, but I have home-training, so I didn’t.

I couldn’t wait for him to finish cooking. I migrated from the paella to the dance floor as couples and groups of women switched from salsa to tango to belly dancing and back to salsa. Other folks sat in booths talking.

The party drew was the coolest mix of Latin, Hispanic, black and white people (and those were Observer co-workers!) that I’ve seen in Charlotte in a few months. The Charlotte Tango Society and Charlotte Salsa hosted the debut event, which they called the World Mix Party. I can’t wait to attend the next one.

You know I’ll let you know when it happens, but if you want to get down with the group: www.charlottesalsadance.com

Mint Condition packs Amos'

Women whooped, men threw their hands in the air and everybody in a packed Amos’ Southend grooved to Mint Condition.

This was the band’s second visit to Charlotte in three years and the audience enthusiastically greeted their return. Fans were packed in Amos’s from the stage to the middle of the club and then it thinned out toward the back. The upstairs balcony was full as well.

Mint Condition is quietly becoming the Earth, Wind & Fire of ’90s R&B. Unlike most acts that had teenager girls back then; the members of Mint Condition are true musicians.

Along with the required favorites such as "(Breaking My Heart) Pretty Brown Eyes" and "What Kind of Man Would I Be,” the band unleashed a 15-minute instrumental set that traversed Latin grooves and rock. Lead singer Stokley Williams wailed on the drums and gave up the spotlight to his saxophone player.

Initially, I wondered if the show would do well because advance ticket prices started at $30. Charlotte’s urban audience is fickle. Mint Condition performed here a few years ago and they haven’t had a hit since the ’90s. The turnout surprised me. Considering that John Legend sold out in December, and now the Mint Condition concert went well, I wonder if it means Charlotte’s R&B fans will consistently support live music in nightclubs.

What do you think? Will R&B fans support more live music? Who else would you like to see perform in Charlotte. Post your replies below.

Gnarls Barkley dilemma

As I was saying in Wednesday's blog: I'm sitting two rows in front of Cee-Lo of Gnarls Barkley at the Red Hot Chili Peppers' concert. He's obviously trying to spend a little time with his family, but I'd love to get two minutes with him for a podcast interview.

Here's what I did:
I waited until the last song and approached him. I explained that I worked for the Charlotte Observer, and that I had interviewed him a few years ago at Studio 74 nightclub. I ask him for two minutes. He remembers me, and says he's getting ready to go because they're headed to D.C. He asks if he can call me. I give him my card.

I still haven't heard from him yet.

Mayor of Detroit partying in Charlotte

Sorry guys, I've been fighting a cold this week and I'm slipping on the blog.

Last weekend was absolutely nuts. On Friday, I partied at NV lounge for the Julius Peppers birthday party. Highlight of the evening? No. 90 bought up the bar at 12:30 a.m. That meant the bar tab was on him. Julius, I love my Redskins, but you're my new favorite player.

On Saturday, I hit the Digital Divas party at the Sunset Club. Guess who was in the house? None other than Kwame Kilpatrick, mayor of Detroit. Apparently, he was visiting some friends in Charlotte and came out to party. He wasn't uppity either. Kilpatrick was on the dance floor doing his thing thang.

Bullriding and big beats

Congrats to Charlotte-area band Sunny Ledfurd. The band's music is on the
Professional Bull Riders Web site. You will probably hear a few of its
tracks, such as “Buck, Buck, Buck,” at the Dale Jr. PBR Clash at
Bobcats Arena this weekend. www.pbrnow.com

Most overplayed songs

In honor of the Fray's performance at Ovens Auditorium on Monday, we held a features department survey at the Observer to determine the most overplayed songs in the history of mankind. The Fray sings "How to Save a Life." It’s that sappy song you hear on nearly every TV show and top 40 radio station. We published the results in Friday's E&T, and you can hear clips on the Paid to Party Podcast.

But now, it's your turn. What song do you think are the most overplayed songs ever? Post your replies below.

What would you do?

So I'm waiting for the Red Hot Chili Peppers to perform on Tuesday night at the Bobcats Arena, and Cee-Lo Green of Gnarls Barkley sits down two rows behind me with his family. His group's just opened for the Chili Peppers, and he is trying to spend some time with his folks.

I want to get two minutes with him for a quick interview, but I can tell he doesn't want to be bothered. He turns down the first person that asks him for a picture, explaining that if he poses for one then others will want shots as well. Midway through the RHCP concert, he relents and politely signs autographs for a couple of women, and poses for a few pictures with adoring fans. A little boy hangs on his arm and a woman (who acts like his girlfriend) hovers behind him.

Put yourself in my shoes. What do you do in this situation? You know artists who are on tour have little time to spend with their family. It's obvious Ceelo wants an hour to chill with his peeps and watch the show. Do you bug him for an interview or leave him alone?

Post your replies below. On Thursday, I'll tell you what I did.

Can you find love in a bar?

I’ve been reading the exchange on the “Who Needs a Husband” post. The comment by “Kevin” still gnaws at me. No, not the part about me hating men, blah, blah. That’s typical.

I’m talking about his comment criticizing me for talking to women at Fox & Hound. For some reason, I often hear people say you can’t meet anyone of substance in a club or bar. It makes it sound as if every person that hangs out or occasionally visits bars is not marrying material. At the same time, people often say single folks should meet a church-going girl or guy, as if people who go to church don’t go to clubs.

What do you think? Can you meet a person of substance at a nightclub? Post your replies below.